High Stories: “I Got So High I Accidentally Flashed My Neighbor’s Ring Camera”

It was a hot summer night. I had taken a 30mg edible that hit a little harder than expected—like, “why do my bones feel soft?” hard. I was lounging at home, vibing, eating watermelon out of a mixing bowl, and embracing my truest form: no pants, no shame, full freedom.

Then, suddenly… I felt the call of nature. Not spiritual nature. Literal nature. I needed air. I wanted to feel the breeze on my face. I wanted to stargaze. I wanted to have a poetic, barefoot-high-girl-moment on my back patio.

So I walked outside. Still pantless. Still high.

I was standing there fully vibing with the moon, when I noticed it—a little red light across the yard.

My neighbor’s Ring camera. Pointed. Directly. At me.

Full cheeks. No warning. I was giving rear-facing main character energy to a motion-sensor security system.

In my head, I panicked. What does Ring do with footage? Does it go to the cloud? The authorities? My neighbor’s iPad?? Do I need to move??

I dropped into a crouch like I was in a war movie, crab-walked back into the house, and slammed the door behind me like that would delete the footage.

Next day, my neighbor waved at me like nothing happened. But I know he knows.