If Drake Was a Weed Strain, What Would He Be?

If Champagne Papi came in nug form, would he be mellow, moody, or just make you text your ex? Let’s find out.

Drake is more than just a rapper—he’s a cultural phenomenon, a walking meme, a certified lover boy, and the ultimate symbol of Toronto's energy. His music has soundtracked breakups, late-night drives, and legendary club nights. But what if Drake wasn’t just a music icon—what if he was a weed strain? Would he be a smooth, mellow indica that hits you with the feels like Marvins Room? Or would he be a high-energy sativa that keeps you vibing like One Dance? Maybe he is a perfectly balanced hybrid, switching between moods as effortlessly as he switches between rapping and singing.

Strain Type: The Hybrid of All Hybrids

Drake isn’t just one thing—he’s a rapper, singer, entrepreneur, actor, and professional heartbreak expert. He’s got songs that make you want to fight your ex’s new partner and then songs that make you text them at 2 AM apologizing for things you didn’t even do.

That’s why if Drake were a weed strain, he’d be the most balanced hybrid ever created. His sativa side would give you energy, confidence, and a sense of unstoppable ambition, just like when Drake drops a braggadocious anthem like Started From the Bottom.

Meanwhile, his indica side would hit you with the emotional weight of a late-night drive while Take Care plays in the background, perfect for when you want to stare out the window and question your life choices.

The effects of Drizzy Kush (working title, unless we call it Certified Lover Bud) would hit differently depending on your mood. Take a few hits, and you’ll feel hyped up like you just won an NBA championship while wearing a custom OVO tracksuit. Take a few more, and suddenly, you’re reminiscing about that one text you never should’ve sent.

Aroma: Champagne Papi Energy

Drake’s brand is all about luxury, smoothness, and sophistication, so his weed strain would have to smell like success in a jar.

Picture top notes of champagne grapes because, obviously, he’s Champagne Papi. The sweet, crisp scent would make every hit feel like you’re celebrating in the VIP section. Hints of Canadian pine would give a nod to his Toronto roots, adding a fresh, cool undertone, like a nighttime drive through The 6.

Finally, undertones of expensive cologne and soft suede would complete the experience because Drake always smells like a high-end department store, the kind of scent that lingers on your hoodie after one of his R&B tracks ruins your whole night. Basically, it smells like the inside of a Rolls-Royce Phantom right after winning a Grammy.

Flavor Profile: Smooth, Sweet, and a Little Extra

Drake’s weed strain wouldn’t just taste good—it would taste expensive. A flavor so refined that after smoking it, you’d immediately start Googling flights to Turks and Caicos. The inhale would be smooth and slightly sweet, with notes of champagne and honey, like sipping a glass of Dom Pérignon while wearing a silk robe. You’d catch hints of tropical mango because Drake spends half his time in the Caribbean, hanging with Popcaan and Bad Bunny. Then, on the exhale, there’d be a subtle kick of spice, just enough to remind you that he still has bars, even if he sings 60% of the time now. The taste would be so smooth and complex that you’d forget you’re even smoking—kind of like how Drake effortlessly dominates the Billboard charts without even trying.

What Happens When You Smoke Drake?

Smoking Drizzy Kush would be an emotional rollercoaster, perfectly curated for any situation. The first few hits would put you in full confidence mode. Suddenly, you feel like the richest person in the room. You’re hitting texts with the "you up?" energy, feeling untouchable and convinced you need to post a cryptic Instagram caption about your past struggles. Your inner Certified Lover Boy awakens. But midway through the high, it shifts into nostalgia mode. You start thinking about old friendships, scrolling through texts you should ignore, and questioning why life moves so fast. This is the moment where Drake’s entire Take Care album suddenly makes sense.

Late into the high, you’ve fully settled into pure vibes mode. The high smooths out, and now you’re just coasting, letting the music wash over you. You’ve fully embraced your Toronto energy, and if anyone asks how you’re doing, you just say, "It’s all good, bro."

Who Would Smoke It?

Not everyone is ready for the emotional complexity of Drizzy Kush. This is for the ones who think Drake is at his best when he’s rapping AND singing, have at least ONE ex they still think about on occasion, believe in manifesting success but also believe in crying at 3 AM, wear OVO merch like it’s their actual uniform, and have watched every Toronto Raptors game, even when they’re losing.

If you’ve ever used Drake lyrics as a way to process your emotions, congratulations—you’re exactly the target audience for this strain.

Final Puff

Drake, as a weed strain, would be the ultimate luxury hybrid—smooth, vibey, and capable of switching from hype mode to deep introspection in minutes. It would pair perfectly with a night of plotting success, sending risky texts, or just chilling on a Toronto rooftop, staring at the skyline while thinking about life.

So, would you roll up some Drizzy Kush? Or would it leave you too deep in your feelings? Either way, one thing’s for sure—you’d be vibing with The 6 God energy all night long.